hi again

It has been crazy around here lately… and unfortunately, the blog has been a little neglected.  I had the day off of work today, so finally I have a second to write a little bit. Spending the day at home alone with Baby Grae makes me miss my maternity leave even more. I love having him all to myself and being able to give him my undivided attention.

He’s going to be 4 months old tomorrow!  I cannot believe it.  Last night my emotions got the best of me, and, as my sweet boy slept in my arms, I bawled and bawled because he is growing up too fast.  Ian thinks I am crazy (he’s probably right) as he is so excited for Grae to get a little older so he can teach him things.  I wish there was a rewind, pause, or slow motion button- I haven’t gotten my fill of newborn baby boys yet.  Maybe its time for more? 😉

On another note, some things fell through with RJ’s family, so it looks like we get to keep him longer than DFACS intended.  He’s learning fast and is such a great fit into our family.  I’m dreading the day when DFACS tells us he has to leave us.  We celebrated his 5th birthday over the weekend and took him to Chuck E. Cheese.  It’s all he has been talking about for days.  🙂

My summer vacation countdown has started: 42 days of school left until I get to spend morning, noon and night with my baby! 🙂 Gahhh! We are going to have so much fun!

 

1 year later

So, it is kind of a big day for TheMielkeWay!

Exactly one year ago, on March 8, 2011, time stood still.  It was one of the happiest moments of our lives, and a day that we will never forget.  It was the day we found out we were expecting our first precious miracle.  I can’t even fathom our lives without Grae, so it is impossible to think that only one year ago we didn’t even know he existed.

In addition to it being TheMielkeWay’s first anniversary, our blog also reached 31,000 all-time views from 60 different countries!!  I know that’s not too impressive for many of you bloggers out there, but to me, its a giant, crazy number.

🙂 Thank you so much for reading all my rambles.

Andrea

 

15 weeks

Grae is now squealing like a little piggy!! Oh, it is just the best little sound- we crack up laughing every time.  Then, he wrinkles up that perfect little nose and laughs with us.  Boy, does he have us wrapped around his tiny little finger already.

My Dad has started calling Grae a BLOB, because he still hasn’t rolled over, and really shows no intention of learning.  He prefers to be carried by his Momma, and that is perfectly fine by me.  We just remind Grae that Grandpa’s nickname is Big Ugly.  🙂

He’s not so good with tummy time, but his little legs make up for it.  He can support all of his weight, if only he could keep his balance…

And, the biggest accomplishment this week- HE FOUND HIS FEET!!  He now lifts his legs up and grabs those little piggy toes every time he sees ’em.  🙂

Revelations

I often hear other parents comparing their baby’s progress to his or her peers or complaining about the fact that their baby hasn’t “slept through the night yet” or that they “can’t wait until he starts solids”.  I have come to a revelation.  I will never be THAT Mom.    Don’t get me wrong, with each new milestone Grae achieves, I am more proud than the last.  I will tell every stranger on the street about his newest accomplishment.  But, seriously, what is the rush? I couldn’t imagine wishing away one single moment of Baby Grae.

It’s human nature to look towards the future – to imagine all the fun that comes with the next milestone in your child’s life… but Grae is only 3 months old and I can’t begin to wrap my brain around where those three months have gone! I don’t even want to think about those chunky thigh rolls disappearing or acknowledge that there might in fact be a time when he stops smelling like a baby.

When Baby achieves milestones is not a reflection of how “advanced” he is, or how wonderful of a parent he has.  In the end, all babies will walk, talk, crawl, and roll over, it just might be on their own schedule. One thing I have learned in just the first few months of being a momma is to live in the moment. Don’t get me wrong here, I’m not in anyway saying its not important to stimulate, encourage and have high expectations for children.  I simply don’t want to take one single second for granted.

I never, ever want to look back and regret not taking enough time to enjoy every part of my wonderful baby.  I want to do more watching and memory making than pushing him into the next stage of his development. I purely want to fill his life with love and expose him to as many things I possibly can as often as I can, and watch him do with it what he will.

So, that’s what I’m thinking about these days.

Here’s to slowing down and smelling the roses, my dear friends.

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My new approach

I have learned that as you make your way through life, there are cycles of times when you feel like you have it all figured out and at other times you couldn’t feel more lost.

For the last month or two, I have been excessively anxious.  I was absolutely terrified to return to work after three months of maternity leave.  I didn’t know how Grae would handle a daycare situation.  I was unsure how I would be able to adjust to lesson planning, teaching, and being a mommy at the same time.  I didn’t know if I had the strength to deal with any unforeseen crises that always tend to arise during already stressful situations.

Typically, I would advise anyone with these feelings to prioritize and cut down on the number of daily tasks in order to do the important things well instead of doing everything half heartedly.

But, instead, I did exactly the opposite.

I signed up for another semester of Ph.D. school, I put our name back on the list to foster children, I started a workout program, we moved a four year old boy into our home, and I decided that now is as good of a time as any to start piloting a new science program at work.

And the results?

Fabulous.

I’ve been in this foreign, yet wonderful place where I feel like all the right answers are falling into my lap, and even though our lives are crazier than they ever have been, I’m feeling more and more confident each day.  I have less time to sit and stew about all of the things that I need to accomplish the next day and instead I focus on what needs to get done today.  I’m sleeping better than I have for over a year now (who can say that with a 3 month old baby?!) and I feel like, together, we have gotten so good at this new “hectic” life, that it is starting to feel just like an every day routine.  The most unexpected result is that I have more time in my day now than I did before.  I believe that in trying to deal with my nervousness and anxiety, I was spending a lot of time “decompressing” in front of the T.V.-or the bath, or any number of other unproductive places, which in turn, just made less time to do things and more time for me to dwell on all those lovely things that had my mind going a mile a minute every minute of the day.

With each new undertaking, I’m made more aware of the phenomenal support system I have in my husband and parents.  I know my feelings would be very different if it wasn’t for the three of you.  I love you all and can’t thank you enough for supporting me through all of the insanity.  😉

I’m sure I will soon cycle back to the stage of life where I question every decision I have made, so I’m just going to live it up for the short time that it lasts- but I wanted to share my new coping strategy, because for right now- it is working wonders. 😉